


AV Heroes

by merumoth



Category: Ensemble Stars! (Video Game)
Genre: M/M, Not Serious, Not-a-fic, comedy?
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-09-13
Updated: 2019-11-30
Packaged: 2020-10-17 13:14:54
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,535
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20621618
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/merumoth/pseuds/merumoth
Summary: College AU where Rei and Tsumugi decided to make amateur porn videos, because they're already friends with benefits anyway.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

>   
  
Look at them. They would totally fit the role.

In the sense of pleasing men, they are unstoppable. In the sense of pleasing women, they are also unstoppable. They think they can please anyone who comes to them. Unstoppable. The only thing that _does_ stop them is that they don't do it full-time, so college finals and social life get in the way of their fun hobby.

Tsumugi specializes in oral. He will put his mouth on almost anything he's offered, at least once, and taste everything at least once. It's calming and he likes stuffing things in his face in general (even though he can't eat _that_ much.)He lives for the control he can have over the pleasure of his partners. When his existence is always in everyone else's hands, he can take pride in the one single thing he is good at. 

Meanwhile, Rei is just the best at driving anyone wild without even touching anything besides their ass. Yes. This is how he teases anyone who comes to him that doesn't know what the big deal about anal is. "It's 'cause most people don't think that it can be used t' fuck. It feels real good, yeah?"

Fant_ass_tic!

* * *

Tsumugi prides himself on being gentle when handling people, but Rei usually gets more out of his partners because... realistically, if you're filming porn, no one's gonna want vanilla. 

"Get out of here, Tsumugi. Rei's tagline alone makes him Best Boy of the channel." -- Pornhub user fufu6969

On developing their taglines:

> “Tsumugi is vanilla, so clearly I'm chocolate."
> 
> “--With your specialty, 'chocolate' does not at all sound like you want it to, Rei-kun."

Rei's initial tagline was changed to "Fantasstic" instead.

* * *

Someone, early on, asked Tsumugi to fuck them roughly, and he was like…

(Tsumugi prefers making his partners feel like royalty.)

"Rei-kun, help--" He panics because he's not confident he can play rough at all, but then looks at this partner who is fairly delicate, and then... "Wait, no Rei-kun, don't help--"

"Not listenin'!" Meanwhile, Rei is busy with someone else that the volunteer cameraman has been ignoring this entire time. He looks _right_ into the camera. "I'm busy. Unlike _that_ guy." He gives a smug smirk and nods his head in Tsumugi’s direction off to the side.

He doesn't do anything but smirk at the camera for several smoldering seconds, so the cameraman moves it back to Tsumugi and his partner, both awkwardly sitting on the bed on the other side of the room. "Rei-kun, that's so rude! People will get bored if you're all bark and no bite!"

"If it's bitin' ya want, it's bitin' ya get." The camera only gets to his face (shit-eating-grin) after he's said it.

"We are trying to film, you know! Do your job and not insult me so carelessly, please?!"

* * *

Tsumugi asks Rei to add another day on their film schedule, saying it's because he wants to film an orgy or... something. It turns out that it is not, in fact, an orgy. Instead, it's just a giant bukkake party and Tsumugi just wanted Rei there to "take a picture of my face after every load."

Rei is _extremely disappointed._

"Tsumugi. Don't act like I'm gettin' ass if I'm not."

"Well... I suppose it was exaggerating. You can have my ass once we're done."

(One massive sigh later... )

Rei proceeds to agree to this solely because Tsumugi lets him do shitty sport narration on mobile camera videos in between each pictures. He turns the camera to himself sometimes, awkwardly trying to mimic the selfie angle when it's not even possible to see his own face in the video until the editing phase.

"Oh, oh, ohhh?! He's goin', he's goin', he got this--"

Instead, the current man's ballsack misses Tsumugi's open mouth, smacking his nose instead.

".. Ohhhh, he don't got it."

Later, as they're wrapping up the session: "Aaaand our final score: twelve! The same number he'd gathered t'begin with. But wait?! Could he get just one more bonus point?!" A dramatic zoom down at Tsumugi's face, and the sound of unzipping. "Could he... beat the record score?!"

"Rei-kun, I thought you wanted ass..." Tsumugi's voice is hoarse. He’s wiping his face with his hands, onto a tissue, then onto another tissue, repeat, then a damp cloth. It's just not enough to get all the dried flakes off his cheeks, let alone his lips and chin.

There's a grumble for several seconds, audible only to himself and the built-in microphone. "The _balls_ of this man..."

Rei turns the camera to himself with a determined, excited face like nothing happened. And, in the deepest voice he could muster: "Wonder how next game's scores will tally up! What's the forecast lookin' like?!" 

It's still Rei, but he turns his head to the other side, voice rising at least one octave. "Well! There's a twelve-man orgy next Saturday at 7PM, get your Pornhub premium passes before they sell out!"

* * *

  * They high-five each other right on video for a job well done... yes, they're probably naked doing so, but on a Pornhub channel, who cares?
  * They compete against each other for whoever gives the most orgasms. They may have a really stupid point system for scoring... it's for a joke, but sometimes they take it seriously.
  * Their videos get so silly that their channel eventually reaches 5k subscribers within the first six months. This is potentially because the comments of "I couldn't even get off to this without laughing" made other viewers visiting the site curious.
  * One time, Tsumugi is apparently doing another damn deepthroat video. Rei’s so fucking bored of this. Out of the blue, he tells a really awful joke.  
Tsumugi chokes -- and he's never done that when only halfway down. He looks so appalled that Rei would mess him up on camera like this! Unfortunately, whoever he's blowing ruffles his hair and doesn't let him fully free his mouth. This might be a good thing, if Rei's the one asked.
  * There are several pointless not-NSFW videos on their channel with them doing the latest viral dance going around the internet at the time of the upload. They don't necessarily have the time to practice one when finals hit, but at one point when asked on a stream, they did an impromptu version to a song they've never heard before.
  * Rei’s so bored he makes videos of pranking Tsumugi, especially when he's sleeping. He stops being a dick when Tsumugi gets teary eyed because Rei put a jalapeno to his lips and he assumed it was, well, you know. “How can you do this to me?! How would you feel if I slid a pepper into _your_ ass, Rei-kun?!”
  * Tsumugi gets plenty of revenge. He sets up a few hidden cameras in Rei’s room for a couple days, takes videos, and makes a compilation of various dumb shit Rei does when alone. He uploads it, and sends it to Rei by text with nothing but ‘ : )’. It’s set to unlisted at first, but Rei’s reaction was priceless. 


	2. Chapter 2

Sometimes, when Rei gets ass, it's his own ass.

At one point, Tsumugi turned the tables, pushing Rei down and staying above him. "Hey, Rei-kun, let's try something new." He hushed Rei with his fingertip, leaning back, and lifting those half-muscular legs up over his shoulders... "Oh, that's right, you've been working out less."

"_Hey!_ Ya telllin' me that 'something new' means makin' fun of me? That ain't new at all!"

"The point is just to make you all flustered, you know." Tsumugi snickered behind his hand. "It's working, too."

Grumble, grumble. My, my, how the tables turn.

The video got over fifty cute comments -- Tsumugi read them aloud on a video once. He uploaded it, and instantly, Rei shouted from the other room, "The hell?! Ya _filmed_ that?!"

* * *

"Today, Tsumugi's eatin' a banana instead of dick."

Some muffled mumbling happened behind the banana, but surprisingly, Rei was speaking literally. Tsumugi removed it from his face, chewing idly. There was a lovely blue vibrator just two inches away from his ass, and even as Rei picked it up to turn it on, Tsumugi had no reaction, only continuing his obvious munching. (Come to think of it, the chunk off the banana was pretty big, too.)

The vibe, already slathered with lube, was slick to the point where the innermost parts between his ass cheeks shined with more lube. (That's not relevant but I'm continuing.) He lifted his legs and spread them obediently, vacantly staring at a point just above the camera while munching. Already, this didn't look serious.

"The goal is jus' ta make him forget about the banana." Rei held up the vibe, winked at the camera, before pushing it against Tsumugi's anus. Again, no reaction.

Nudging it inside didn't change anything, either. Swirling it around in there didn't do anything. Pushing it in and out, nothing. _Monch._

Again, Rei turned back to the camera, smirked, and. Without any warning, still looking at the camera, he shoved it in firmly, suddenly, and held it tight in there.

"Waa-aah?" 

Rei turned away from the camera to move his smirk to Tsumugi. The banana had dropped, he chewed quickly and swallowed roughly, and then lifted his back upright. "Not fair, Rei-ku~u~un... !"

"What a drama queen. Ya sure ain't thinkin' too hard when I say I'd challenge ya."

"Should relax, then. Been studyin' to the point of caffeine withdrawal, ya know? Not healthy."

Tsumugi's face was far too red to answer, still biting his lip and turning his glare elsewhere. Rei shoved the vibrator in a little harder, and Tsumugi shut himself up with the banana, too annoyed to give Rei the satisfaction from that moan he was clearly aiming for.

Still, one more time, Rei turned back to the camera, a smug smirk on his face. 

"He lost."

* * *

Tsumugi took a video of Rei's incessant quest for ass once. In the foreground, his feet high up on the table in the shot, exaggerated sipping noises of whatever drink he had a straw in, and humming their channel's intro jingle.

And Rei stopped everything, balls-deep in his partner.

"**Tsumugi**."

"Yeeeees~?"

Rei bared his fangs. "Stop wastin' time and record me, not those damn shoes!"

... Tsumugi zoomed in on that.

_"Tsu. Mu. Gi."_

"Ahaha, I know, I know..."

* * *

One Sunday morning, this exchange happened by text:

> <( wanna come eat ass with me? )
> 
> ( I just woke up to this, Rei-kun, please let me sleep in? )>
> 
> <( its real nice outside! )
> 
> ( Ummm, where are you? )>
> 
> <( church )
> 
> (????)>

* * *

Tsumugi is demonstrating how to put condoms on with the help of a particularly realistic dildo. In the background, Rei opens the door, but Tsumugi either ignores him, or fails to notice. Instead, he's still talking to the camera, with that gentle voice droning on and on...

"Tsumugi? What're ya doin'?" Rei stands by the door in the background.

"Be very gentle when rolling it out around the penis..." Tsumugi is not even remotely paying attention.

"Tsumugi?"

"... and be sure to secure it firmly at the base..."

Rei sneaks closer to peek at the camera, squints.

"If it doesn't cover the entire penis, do not use it..."

"Who're ya recordin' for? All the viewers know this already."

"How do we know that?" Tsumugi shouts over his shoulder, but Rei's head is right there. His ear is so close he nearly falls over, staggers to the side in surprise. Even now, Tsumugi doesn't stop talking, but at least he stopped shouting. "Maybe our viewers are all virgins!"

Rei is silent.

Tsumugi is silent.

Rei wolf-whistles. "Damn. _That's brutal."_ He walks off, then there's the sound of keys clunking against countertop. Softly, from a distance: "... damn."

"I didn't mean it like that! Why are you always teasing me? Rei-kun! I'd never be that awful to our viewers!"

There's nothing in the next 5 seconds besides Rei's off-screen voice.

"Suuuuuuure."

* * *

Another notable moment in that video:

Tsumugi had moved onto the sizes of each condom, demonstrating what "too big", "too small", and "just right" look like.

Rei stepped into view again, only a shirt on, half-hard dick right there, standing behind the dildo's perch on the coffee table. 

So, Tsumugi looked up to his face, creating an awkward silence. He stared, so Rei stared back, hands on hips.

"Just bein' a live model."

That's it, that's all Rei said. Tsumugi sighed loudly, stared at the camera, exasperated and clearly not in the mood to argue.

* * *

Early on, before they had many subscribers, they spent a lot more time with the actual sex. However, they were also inexperienced, as shown the time Tsumugi was close to "practicing" with a lube-covered carrot.

Luckily, Rei was there to pluck that vegetable right out of Tsumugi's hands -- it dropped on the floor, being covered in lube and all. Not that it dissuaded Rei, who wiped the lube off his hand on Tsumugi's thigh, raising one of them and delivering a spank with moderate strength.

"You do _not_ put anything in there that ain't made _specifically_ for anal, Tsumugi."

He was so stern that Tsumugi clearly felt a bit patronized there, opening his mouth to say something--

"-- No. Do not start talkin' back."

Tsumugi sighed, nothing more, and still seemed pretty gloomy even while Rei picked him up by the shoulders to show him how to finger a little deeper.

* * *

One time, Tsumugi asked Rei to abstain from any and all sexual stimulation for a week. He had absolutely no idea how Rei managed to do it, but he did. The amount of grumpy comments in their channel's blog/status posts increased substantially over the next few days.

They had set up a short stream to document the last day, when Tsumugi offered his ass. There he was, ass-up, one hand applying generous amounts of lubricant in there, while Rei watched, with the deepest frown several viewers had ever seen.

"Three..."

Tsumugi's countdown began.

"Two..."

Rei's eyes narrowed at the target.

"One..."

Poised to pounce. Rei was _ready_.

"Okay!"

There it was. Tsumugi curled a single lube-covered finger to his thumb, smiling to the camera, the OK Hand, the signal--

\-- And that was that. Rei leapt on his prey, the completely stereotypical predatory manner being highly appreciated by his fans. It was, obviously, the roughest sex they'd ever done on camera before.

Although Tsumugi was fully expecting it, he still ended up panting out things like:  
"I think I'm a masochist."  
"God, Rei-kun, that hurt, do it again."  
"Why are your teeth so _sharp_?! Aah, ah-- _ow_?!"

Meanwhile, Rei growling responses:  
"We know!"  
"Shut up already, I am."  
"No screamin'! Just givin' ya love bites!"

Comments on that stream buzzed about "this is just like an ABO fic!", something they both had to look up later and, of course, made two whole videos over.

Though the first video was Rei as "omega", the viewers frequented Tsumugi as "omega" more -- but really, the first one was so soft and loving it got more views at first. And, as a result, Tsumugi had a great time teasing Rei about how cute he was with dick up _his_ ass.

It was the start of a wonderful inside joke, a joke that Rei was the butt of! Literally!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> you're welcome lol


End file.
